


Devil Ex Machina

by apathyinreverie



Category: Lucifer (TV), Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Fix-It, Humor, M/M, Magnus gets his magic back
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-12
Updated: 2018-11-12
Packaged: 2019-08-22 14:29:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,832
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16599683
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/apathyinreverie/pseuds/apathyinreverie
Summary: The note was bright purple, only had a few words and an LA area code phone number on it.When Alec held it up in question, Magnus had just sighed. "Darling, don't make me look at that eyesore. I'm only keeping it for absolute emergencies. Like the-world-has-already-ended sort of emergencies."Now, Alec wonders whether this right here constitutes such an emergency. Because with Magnus fading, it certainlyfeelslike Alec's world is about to end.So, he fishes out his phone and dials the number on the note.---Ultimately, what if Lucifer isn't atallamused by his imbecile of a brother turning the devil's favorite nephew mortal.





	Devil Ex Machina

**Author's Note:**

> Magnus' magic fix-it, crossover with the TV series Lucifer (because I couldn't resist the idea of Asmodeus being scolded by his older brother for making the devil's favorite nephew mortal) and thus somewhat crack-ish.

Alec had first seen the note during one of their many how-to-save-the-world research binges.

The note was actually quite hard to miss.

Bright purple - _really_ bright purple -  with a phone number and a 'Call me, Mags! Remember, I'm your favorite!' written next to it in loopy handwriting. It had actually looked a little singed around the edges, almost like Magnus might have attempted to burn it at some point. It had looked so out of place between the ancient scrolls and magical knick-knacks that Alec had fished it out of the middle drawer of the desk and held it up to Magnus with a raised eyebrow.

Magnus had taken one look and promptly groaned. 'Oh magic, put that thing away.'

The exasperation in the warlock's voice had made Alec grin. 'Your favorite? Your favorite what?' he had asked.

'Uncle. My supposedly favorite uncle.' Magnus had sighed. 'Really, darling, don't make me look at that eyesore. I'm only keeping it for absolute emergencies. Like the-world-has- _already_ -ended sort of emergencies.'

Alec had snorted but put the note back into the drawer.

Now, Alec wonders whether this right here constitutes such an emergency.

Because with Magnus fading it certainly _feels_ like Alec's world is about to end.

And there isn't a damn thing he can do about it.

There was an attack - ever since Magnus traded in his magic in order to save Jace, there have been countless attacks from everyone too damn cowardly to challenge Magnus whilst at full power taking this opportunity to get revenge - and Alec hadn't been quick enough to tackle that Seelie aiming a spell at Magnus' back.

Magnus had been fighting - and winning - against another Seelie but hadn't seen the spell coming. As soon as the spell hit, the warlock had collapsed where he stood. He hasn't woken since.

By the time they got Magnus to Catarina, the Seelie magic's hold had already been too strong. In order to break the spell, they either need something to specifically counter this spell - impossible since they don't actually know what spell it _is_ \- or they need someone more powerful than her.

It has been 48 hours and Magnus is obviously losing more and more of his strength the longer he doesn't wake up.

So, they're researching digging through Magnus' study. Pretty much everyone who cares about Magnus is gathered in the loft now, frantically - and ultimately unsuccessfully - searching for any way to wake Magnus. But they are all losing hope fast, because whatever the nature of that spell it seems to be draining Magnus' very life from him. With every hour Magnus' pulse is a little weaker, shallower, slower, his skin a little colder, losing its color.

And now, having upended the middle drawer of Magnus' desk, Alec is once more staring at that note. Magnus voice ringing in his head 'for absolute emergencies' and 'my supposedly favorite uncle'.

Well, this certainly qualifies as an emergency in Alec's eyes. And, okay, Alec knows who Magnus' father is and if the title of uncle is actually to be taken seriously here then there is an actual chance, that this is the phone number of either an angel or a greater demon.

But, Alec has also run out of options.

At this point, he is quite sure he would do anything to save Magnus from whatever the spell is doing to him.

And when he hears Clary call from the living room where she is watching over Magnus - together with Catarina who is doing her best to slow down the spell's effect in any way she can - urgency in her voice, the decision is pretty much already made. He grabs the note as he darts back into the living room, Izzy and Jace hot on his heels.

"What's happening?" he demands.

"His pulse- It-," Clary stutters.

Alec just pushes his way in between everyone else and Magnus, not caring about anything else. When he rests his hand on his neck, Magnus' skin is cold and clammy, his pulse a barely there flutter. And Alec can feel his own breath stutter in his chest with fear at how weak it is.

And no, just no, Alec will _not_ lose him. It was never supposed to be Alec who would have to mourn Magnus. Alec refuses to.

He unceremoniously fishes out his phone and dials the number on the note. He knows everyone is watching him, clearly confused as to who he could possibly be calling right now, seeing as everyone is already gathered in Magnus' living room.

He just puts the call on speaker, not bothering to explain. It rings just twice before the line clicks.

"Speak, peon, what is it you desire?" a voice asks in a heavy British accent.

Alec falters slightly at the weird greeting.

But there is a tug at him and why not just tell the truth? He is calling for help after all.

"To save Magnus," he says.

A pause.

"Oh? Will any Magnus do or are we talking about a particular Magnus here?"

"Magnus Bane."

The slightest pause.

Then the voice returns, sounding almost delighted. "Oho? A friend of Mags'? Oh, this is so exciting. He never lets me meet his friends. Just splendid. Do go on, mortal. You are a mortal, are you not? Well, you sound like a mortal at least."

Alec feels his eyes narrow in annoyance, wanting to get to the point. "Magnus needs help."

"Hm." The skeptical hum he gets in response doesn't match the urgency Alec is feeling at all. Same for the condescension in the next statement. "I am sure Mags will be just fine. Trust me, little mortal, Mags can take care of himself. He always gets rather annoyed with me whenever I 'meddle' as he calls it. Really, my entire family is utterly incapable of accepting help. Me, on the other hand? I _love_ having people help. Why do it yourself if someone else is so graciously offering to do it for you, right?"

If Alec weren't so afraid of losing Magnus right now, he might actually be a little amused that whoever he is currently talking to sounds just like Magnus when the warlock starts rambling one of his inner monologues out loud. As it is, he barely manages to keep from shouting at the person at the other end of the line.

He practically snarls, "I'm sure he would be just fine, if he was awake and not having his life slowly drained away in his sleep."

A pause.

"Hmmm? A spell that is able to keep him under for an extended period of time without his magic interfering? Who was he tangling with that was able to do that to him? The devil himself?" The last three words end in a rather demented giggle that does nothing to calm Alec's nerves. The laughter cuts off abruptly. "Well, it does sound interesting at least. I mean, I suppose I could come by for a visit, and Mags will not even be able to blame me because one of his little friends called me. On that note, who exactly is it I am speaking to at the moment?"

Alec grits his teeth. He doesn't have time for this. "I'm Alec Lightwood. Magnus is my lover."

"Oho? A Lightwood? As in that family that Raziel favors so much?"

Well, Alec doesn't know about the favoring part, but he answers nonetheless, "Yes."

"Oh, this is just getting more exciting by the minute. Mags is fraternizing with the enemy. Oh, I have to come visit now. I will be right there, just one moment, I will have to let the detective know. She gets ever so cross at me whenever I go anywhere without telling her."

Alec wants to protest, wants to say that Magnus might not have 'a moment', but before he can say anything, there is a click and then only the dial tone.

He stares at his phone. Did that guy just hang up on him?

Alec can see Jace opening his mouth, clearly about to ask what is going on but suddenly there is a shift in the air. A portal framed by red-hot swirls of magic opens in the entrance hall and a well-dressed man casually strolls through, a phone held up to his ear.

"Yes, I know detective, and I would have loved to give you a more timely notice, however, it really is a family emergency. What can you do?" A pause. "Yes, yes. I will." Another pause. "Oh, _stop_ it, detective, you are going to make me blush." The stranger finally reaches the living room, looking around. "Ah, I really have to go now. I will inform you post haste upon my return, detective."

A second later, he hangs up, casually slips his phone into his pocket - as though he hadn't just strolled into Magnus' living room, irreverent of any wards in the way - and gives jaunty wave, greeting with a jovial grin, "Well, hello there, everyone. What a colorful collection of friends Mags has."

Everyone has fallen into some sort of defensive stance, Raphael and Simon appearing next to Jace to stand between the stranger and Magnus on the couch. Although, it is Catarina's reaction of slightly wide-eyed apprehension that catches Alec's attention most. Figures that a warlock would be able to tell just what sort of being just entered Magnus' flat.

The stranger continues talking like he doesn't even notice the rather unfriendly faces around the room, "Now, which one of you is my Mags' lover, whom I was just speaking to?" His eyes are dragging along everyone present, briefly catching on Jace before unerringly landing on Alec.

"Ah, well, well, well. Hello there, beautiful. I am assuming you are 'Alec'? I mean you have to be. My nephew would be an absolute fool not to go for someone as gorgeous as you. Am I right?"

Alec sees several people in the room mouth the word 'nephew?', clearly baffled by this turn of events. And while Alec has long since come to terms with Magnus' direct blood-relation to archangels and greater demons, he never thought he would actually meet any of them, much less while Magnus himself isn't there to make introductions.

Both Jace and Izzy must read some of his sudden apprehension, because they immediately take a few steps closer to Alec, despite having no idea what is going on because Alec never told anyone about Asmodeus being Magnus' father and hadn't intended to either.  

The stranger just continues talking, as though not even noticing the ever increasing tension in the room. "Now, what seems to be the problem?"

Alec shakes himself. Well, no sense in first inviting a greater demon to visit and then not actually letting him help. So, Alec just indicates Magnus breathing shallowly on the couch.

The stranger's eyebrows actually rise in surprise. "Now, what could be the cause of that." A pause. "By all that is unholy, what happened to his magic? Well, this just will not do."

The stranger takes a step closer, casually brushing past the werewolf, the two vampires and the Shadowhunter standing in his way, seemingly concentrating on something.

Then he huffs. "Something so simple. Really, it would be simply shameful if Mags died from a little spell like this."

Then the stranger just snaps his fingers. Alec can feel his ears pop from pressure. And Magnus breathes in deeply.

Immediately, all of his focus in on the warlock. "Magnus?"

Magnus continues to breathe a little more deeply now, but his pulse is still shallow, his skin still cold, if maybe starting to warm slightly. But other than that, nothing changes. 

After another few seconds, he turns to look back at the stranger with a frown.

Who immediately protests. "Hey, do not look at me. I only removed that silly little curse. The recovery is up to him. _Trust_ me you don't want me attempting to heal him, my powers lean more towards destruction than healing. Although, usually his magic would have easily taken care of that. So, if you do not mind me asking, just what happened to Mags' magic?"

The words are said flippantly, the tone jovial but at the same time there is _something_ in that voice, something almost like an echo vibrating within the words themselves. It has Alec's instincts take notice, his spine straightening, his fight-or-flight reflexes at the ready. Everyone else seems to be reacting in a similar manner.

He makes himself push past the apprehension and answers, "He traded in his magic for a favor from his father several weeks ago."

A pause.

Then a scowl. "Oh, I am going to wring my brother's neck. He bloody well knows Mags is my favorite, the only one out of the entire family who gets that life is supposed to be fun. Oh, this is just unacceptable. If you would excuse me for just a moment."

Not waiting for any sort of reply, the man turns halfway, makes a circular hand gesture to open another portal. But it doesn't look like a normal portal. There doesn't seem to be any sort of warping effect, just a circular rip in the middle of the air, opening to a different place on the other side.

The edges are dark - so dark they seem to suck in the light from around the room - and interspersed with red, lightning-like flashes. The view beyond the portal is desolate, reddish and Alec suddenly has a really bad feeling about just where that portal might be leading.

The stranger just sticks his head through the portal, apparently looking left and right, before calling out in an irritated voice, "Brother! Oh, brother, where art thou?"

They can hear steps approaching on the other side and then a voice replies, "Brother? What are you doing here?"

"An excellent question. However, I will have to ask you the same thing. Or rather, what have you _done_?"

A long-suffering sigh is audible on the other side of the portal.

"Oh, do not dare sigh at me. You took Mags' magic?! You _know_ he is my favorite."

 _Wait. Is that Asmodeus on the other side?_ Alec thinks incredulously.

A pause. Then, "Ah."

"Yes, ah. Get over here _right_ now and fix it." The stranger demands, pulling his head back.

_Wait, what? Did he just-_

But before Alec can protest in any way, another man is already stepping through the portal, still talking to the stranger. "Well, you do not have to ask me twice to follow you topside. I have been meaning to visit anyway and your way is always so much more comfortable than tagging along with a random summoning. No one has the guts to summon one of us directly anymore these days." It's said with a wistful sigh.

The new arrival has Asian features, longish hair and is wearing an old-fashioned outfit that should look ridiculous but somehow doesn't. And unless Alec misinterpreted the situation entirely - which he is starting to really _really_ hope he did - there is a very real possibility that this is Asmodeus, greater demon, Prince of Hell and also Magnus' father.

Which means there are now two greater demons in Magnus' loft. And Alec is honestly a bit at a loss. This isn't quite what he had in mind when he called that number. Well, the stranger clearly doesn't see a problem with simply having invited another greater demon to earth.

Asmodeus is still looking around the room, taking everything in. "Well, this is a rather colorful gathering is it not? Vampires, werewolves, warlocks and nephilim?" he asks, looking utterly amused.

Thankfully, the stranger seems just as overall unamused as Alec is currently feeling. He just points at where Magnus is still unconscious on the couch and states imperiously, "Fix it."

Probably-Asmodeus turns towards the couch. His eyebrows rise on his forehead.

"Hm. He certainly is not looking his best." Asmodeus is actually wearing a grin as he asks, "What happened?"

Alec really wants to punch him. For several reasons. Despite how bad of an idea it would be to punch one of the original greater demons.

"I actually have no bloody idea." The stranger exclaims. "But I do know that he does not have his magic because you imbecile took it. You _know_ that Mags is my favorite. He is the _only_ one of all my nephews and nieces I can stand. And you made him mortal. So, now you will _fix_ it." He claps his hands. "Chop, chop now. I don't have all day."

He sounds airy, almost petulant. But again, there is something in his voice, something echoing in the words themselves that has apprehension pulsing through Alec and everyone - even Asmodeus - straighten their spines.

Finally, the Prince of Hell sighs, clearly giving in. "Alright, alright. It was just supposed to be a lesson, you know. He refused my offer of staying in Edom with me. I had to do _something_."

"You bloody well didn't have to do _anything_ ," the stranger dismisses almost casually, now that Asmodeus agreed to his demand, suddenly appearing just as jovial again as he had before. "Why _would_ anyone want to stay in Edom? Earth is so much more fun. So much sin and desire and people literally willing to sell their soul for just a little bit _more_ in their lives, always greedy, searching for the meaning of life. And the sex! Mortals are so delightfully shameless."

Usually, Alec would be observing everyone's reactions to the repeated mention of Edom but the only thing he can currently focus on is the fact, that it almost sounds like Asmodeus is about to give back Magnus' magic.

Asmodeus takes a step towards the bed. Only to be intercepted by Raphael and a wide-eyed Simon, the latter of which looks like he would prefer to be anywhere but where he currently is but also unwilling to actually let this guy reach Magnus. It's a show of loyalty that honestly surprises Alec. Maybe he should start cutting the vampires some slack. Still, that's something to think about at a different point in time. Because as admirable as this show of loyalty is, it's not going to do any good against one of the Princes of Hell.

"Raphael, Simon," Alec says.

Everyone's attention immediately focuses on him. Including that of Asmodeus himself, who raises his eyebrows once he sees Alec's hand still settled against Magnus neck - Alec is unable to make himself let go for even a moment, despite the stranger supposedly breaking the curse, simply too afraid that the pulse might stop the instant he removes his hand.

"Ah, this must be the lover then, I assume?" Asmodeus asks, looking him up and down.

Alec holds his ground, doesn't look away or falter in any way. He does give a nod, though. No need to unnecessarily piss off one of the most powerful beings in existence. Especially not before this guy has finished returning Magnus' magic.

"Hm. Well, you are certainly pretty enough to deserve his attention. Although, I regret not teaching him to let go of the notion of romantic devotion more effectively," Asmodeus says casually.

And, sure, Alec already hates this guy on principle, just from what Magnus has told him. But the casual derision at one of Magnus' most admirable traits - still being able to love with an all-encompassing devotion despite the centuries of heartbreak in his life - sure isn't helping his rather antagonistic feelings in any way.

"I'm glad you failed," Alec states factually.

Whether it's his words or his rather defiant tone, it gains him a far more attentive glance this time, clearly making some sort of impression. Whether that's a good thing remains to be seen.

"Hm, at least he chose well this time." Asmodeus hums. "But he _had_ to get it right at some point." And the disdainful smile is back.

Alec really doesn't like this condescending asshole at all.

Thankfully, Asmodeus doesn't appear to require any sort of reply from him as the greater demon steps up to the couch.

"Well, now. Let's just..." Asmodeus brings up both of his hands in front of him, spreading his fingers sinuously, widening the gap between his hands further and further. The air around them grows heavy, something building between the demon's hands.

And Alec knows this feeling. It's Magnus' magic. Angel, has he missed feeling its warmth.

And it just continues to build. Far beyond what Magnus usually lets show, so much more magic than is usually swirling around the warlock, further and further, almost feeling tangible at this point, like the air itself is growing viscous with the amount of magic permeating it. Alec can hear someone choking from the ever-growing pressure and there is sweat starting to form on his brow.

_By the angel, so much magic._

Alec had known that Magnus didn't just carry all of his magic around, visible for all to see. But he didn't know that Magnus had _this_ much magic hidden away. He doubts anyone did.

The build-up reaches a point where even Alec is starting to almost feel faint, but then it abruptly stops. There is a moment of silence, absolute stillness where no one seems to even be breathing. Then Asmodeus brings his hands together in a resounding clap, a sound like literal thunder, vibrating through Alec's very bones.

The built-up magic instantly lurches towards Magnus, swirling around him for merely a second before being absorbed, like water on scorched earth, as though Magnus' very being has greedily been waiting for its return just as much as his magic had apparently been eager to return to him.

The sudden lack of magic in the air is so stark, Alec actually has to put effort into remaining standing straight.

From the corner of his eye, he can see Jace put one hand against the couch for balance, Raphael seems to be holding up Simon, while Izzy and Clary lean against each other. Catarina and Luke both seem to be leaning against a wall off to the side.

But most of Alec's focus is on Magnus whose eyes have snapped open and who is now choking on the deep breaths he is desperately trying to pull into his lungs.

Alec unceremoniously pushes everyone else aside as he leans over Magnus.

"Magnus. Hey, you're alright. Just breathe."

Angel, he feels like crying in relief when Magnus brings up a hand to cover the one Alec still has settled on his shoulder. Even though he doesn't say anything yet, still too busy trying to breathe.

Alec can hear Clary give a little sob on the other side of the couch and Luke give a sigh of relief.

He would actually love if all these people could have the damn decency of making themselves scarce. It doesn't sit right with Alec that they would see Magnus struggling like this.

Thankfully, Magnus recovers rather quickly, looking up at him, his eyelids drooping slightly - it will probably take him a little bit to recover from whatever that Seelie spell was doing to him - but the slight smile overtaking his face is immediate upon seeing Alec leaning over him.

"Hey," Alec says, feeling a smile of his own spread over his face.

"Hey yourself," Magnus rasps. "What has you looking so worried, my darling?"

And Alec can't help the slightly incredulous chuckle, heavy with relief.

Jace speaks up from where he is still standing at the end of the couch. "That's totally on you for once. Not my fault this time."

"Nor mine," Izzy chimes in.

"Or mine," Clary asserts.

"I'm never any trouble," Simon says with a decisive nod, gaining raised eyebrows from everyone and an absolutely incredulous look from Raphael.

"You are nothing _but_ trouble," the older vampire says factually.

Alec almost wants to roll his eyes at everyone's antics but is still far too focused on Magnus, who is now frowning, clearly trying to focus on something, noticing that something is different. He brings a hand up in front of him in an all too familiar gesture.

And immediately, blue flames dance along his fingertips.

Magnus promptly chokes. "Wha-?"  

Alec opens his mouth to explain, but before he can say anything, Asmodeus just greets casually, "Hello, son."

Magnus' head immediately whips around towards his father, the expression overtaking his face rather incredulous.

Then the stranger apparently decides he deserves some attention as well, appearing over Asmodeus' shoulder and exclaiming jovially, "Hello Mags! Say hello to your favorite uncle, why don't you?"

Magnus seems to be at a loss for words.

The stranger just continues talking, "Just to be clear, I take full credit for saving you. Your delightful little lover called me for help. And might I just say, good catch! I would love to try him out. He looks like he would be an absolute _delight_ between the sheets. We could share? I mean that seems like a reasonable payment for my help, right?"

Magnus just ignores everyone and turns back to Alec, asking rather incredulously, "Why are my _father_ and my _uncle_ in my apartment? Just what happened while I was out?"

Alec doesn't get a chance to respond, before the stranger is talking again.

"I tell you what happened. You were passed out from some weak little spell that was draining your life away because my imbecile of a brother decided to take your magic because he was sulking over you not wanting to stay in Edom with him. Really, who wants to stay in _Edom_? It is so boring. Even more so than my own dimension. I at least get to come up with ways to torture the sinners."

Asmodeus is frowning at the stranger, clearly offended. "Excuse me? My dimension is anything but boring. And that is rich coming from the one who literally _fled_ their own dimension at the first chance. Did you get bored of all the screaming and wailing?"

The stranger gives a sigh as though Asmodeus is being particularly dense. "Well, who _wouldn't_ get bored after several eons of doing the same thing? At least you have Lilith to tangle with from time to time. No one even dares challenging me anymore."

"Hm, like that's something to complain about." Asmodeus practically huffs. "You try dealing with her during one of her tantrums."

The stranger talks right over the Prince of Hell. "But earth, now earth is fun. Mags gets it, right? He is the _only_ one who gets it. And you actually tried to make him mortal! We will be having words about this, Asmodeus."

There are numerous sudden intakes of breath at the name, seemingly sucking the air out of the room. And Alec had honestly kind of forgotten that everyone else doesn't actually have any way of knowing just who is currently stopping by for a visit.

Then everyone is scrambling, either for their weapons or to get as far away from the Prince of Hell as they possibly can.

Magnus just sighs.

"Well, the cat's out of the bag now, I suppose?" he asks Alec with a long-suffering sigh.

Asmodeus is grinning and the stranger tilts his head in obvious glee, clearly quite happy with the chaos they are causing. "Wait, this was supposed to be a _secret_? Really?"

Jace is choking. "Asmodeus? _Asmodeus_ is your father?"

"Hm, yeah," Magnus hums affirmatively.

Jace whips around to face Alec, probably expecting to see some sort of reaction from him. Alec just shrugs at him.

"Wait, you _knew_?!" Jace exclaims incredulously.

"Yeah," he confirms.

"How long?!"

"I don't know." Alec shrugs. "A while."

There is a few moments of silence. Then Jace sighs out exasperatedly. "A while. A _while_ , he says."

The stranger chimes in once more, "Okay. So, we are good now? Everyone who should be is back to being immortal? Yes? Wonderful."

Amusingly enough, Magnus is looking entirely exasperated by the entire situation at this point. He clearly decides to just ignore everyone as he swings his legs over the side of the couch, getting to his feet.

Alec immediately steps up next to him in case he might need something to lean on and also because he isn't planning to let Magnus out of immediate presence within the next few - hm, how about years, the next few years, yeah, that sounds like an appropriate timeframe.

And Magnus gratefully leans slightly into his side, looking slightly torn for a moment. But then the warlock shrugs, takes Alec's hand in his and says, "Father."

Asmodeus raises his eyebrows.

"This is my lover Alexander. Alexander, this is my father Asmodeus."

"No titles?" the Prince of Hell asks rather amusedly, condescension in his eyes but also showing his clear interest while once more assessing Alec.

Alec does his best to keep his face neutral and not to actually glare. That would probably be a bad idea. As much as he would like to.

"No titles," Magnus confirms.

Then Magnus turns towards the stranger who is watching with an almost giddy expression, expecting his own introduction. And Alec already has a pretty good idea who this might be, despite doing his best to ignore the implications. But well there aren't that many options, considering this stranger just ordered a Prince of Hell around like a kid.

"Uncle, this is Alexander, Alexander this is-"

"Lucifer Morningstar, at your service," the devil interrupts, regrettably confirming Alec's thoughts.

He can hear Catarina choke in the background and everyone else seems to have stopped breathing altogether.

"Pleasure to make your acquaintance," the devil is still talking. "And let me just say, Mags, good catch with this one, he truly is gorgeous. Any chances for that threesome you keep refusing?"

"No thank you, uncle." Magnus sounds entirely exasperated. "I am not having a threesome with you and I am not sharing my lover." It sounds like something Magnus might have gotten long since used to repeating.

"Hm, shame." The devil seems to almost be pouting now..

And Alec doesn't know what his life even _is_ anymore at this point.

But then Lucifer claps his hand. "Well, I must be off now. I have things to do. No rest for the wicked and all that. I am already in trouble with the detective for leaving so suddenly. But you really should come to visit me in LA some time, Mags, see what a real nightclub looks like. I mean, your little Pandemonium is cute, but it really rather lacks flair."

Magnus just rolls his eyes even as he casually wraps an arm around Alexander, apparently undeterred by their company.

The devil just smirks, then turns towards Asmodeus. "Would you like to see, brother? I mean, surely your duties can wait until tomorrow? I will make you a portal back to Edom once we have had some fun."

Asmodeus looks contemplative for a second, then nods. "Sure. I can spare a few hours."

Lucifer grins. He flicks his hand in a circular gesture and a portal is opening off to the side.

Asmodeus steps towards it with a nod at Magnus. "Son."

"Father." Magnus nods back.

Then the devil practically skips over and more or less shoves Asmodeus through the portal - Alec is just going to pretend he didn't hear the greater demon's rather indignant squawk from the other side at being pushed - and gives a grin in Magnus' direction.

"See you, Mags. You really should come to visit." Then his eyes suddenly switch over to Alec. "You as well, lovely Alexander." And suddenly there is something different, something dark and intimidating in those eyes despite the jovial tone, as the devil says right before stepping through the portal, "And _do_ try to keep in mind that Magnus really _is_ my favorite."

Then the so-called evil incarnate is gone, the portal closing behind him with an audible snap.

A second later, Magnus slumps slightly - his strength clearly not yet entirely recovered - and Alec immediately steps in even closer, happy to give support. And possibly, because he is physically unable to not be close to Magnus right now.

By the angel, Alec nearly lost him.

Magnus leans against him gratefully and the smile on his face when he looks up at him almost takes Alec's breath away. He hasn't seen Magnus look this _free_ in weeks. Not since he gave up his magic in order to save Alec's parabatai. He feels an answering smile spread over his face.

After several moments of absolute silence, Jace is the first to speak up, very fittingly summarizing today's events with, "The fuck was that?"

"That was the Prince of Hell Asmodeus and Lucifer himself stopping by for a visit?"  Catarina asks more than states. "Because apparently Magnus is their 'favorite'?"

Luke snorts a laugh.

"Should we let the LA Institute know that the devil himself is living in their city?" Clary asks fretfully. "And that Asmodeus is apparently stopping by for a party? At the devil's nightclub? Which he apparently owns?"

"Oh, they know about Lucy," Magnus says, not so reassuringly. "But they pretty much ignore him. Honestly, there really isn't much anyone _can_ do about the devil setting up camp in their city. And Lucy really doesn't do any harm. He is currently on vacation and I think spends most of his time solving crimes with the LAPD."

"They _know_?!"

"Wait, what?"

"On vacation?"

" _Lucy_?!"

"Hm. He needed a break. Hell really is a dreadfully dull place," Magnus confirms, rather unhelpfully and clearly amused by everyone's reactions. Alec just can't help but grin at Magnus' obvious good mood, entirely unable and unwilling to tear his eyes away.

And then something else seems to occur to Jace as he suddenly asks incredulously, "Wait, did Alec just get a shovel talk from the devil himself about hurting Magnus?"

A pause.

Then Izzy starts laughing delightedly. "You go, big brother. That's certainly not something everyone can claim."

Alec rolls his eyes, but decides that they can all work this out on their own time and promptly starts booting everyone from the apartment by claiming that Magnus needs rest - which might be true but Alec is mostly interested in actually getting to cuddle up to his no-longer-fading lover while he recovers.

Magnus gets a lot of glad-you-didn't-die and congrats-on-recovering-your-magic hugs.

Alec doesn't let go of the warlock's hand even once throughout. So, he is close enough to hear some of the words Jace whispers to Magnus and his smile only widens further.

But finally everyone starts filing out of Magnus' apartment.

The last thing they hear is Simon asking Raphael rather incredulously, "Wait, the devil is _actually_ taking a vacation? He can do that?"

"Apparently so, Simon." Raphael's sigh is long-suffering as the door closes behind them.

Magnus laughs and Alec just grins - holding fast to the hand in his and reveling in the feeling of the warlock's magic buzzing beneath his skin - as he starts pulling Magnus in the direction of the bedroom.

All is as it should be.

**Author's Note:**

> This plot bunny just wouldn't let go of me, so here you go. First time writing anything even slightly crack-ish, so I would really love some feedback on that (*^^*)

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [[Art] Devil Ex Machina](https://archiveofourown.org/works/17889638) by [Kaister](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kaister/pseuds/Kaister)




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